Winning at Christmas: Your Guide to Managing your Eating Disorder this Christmas

Christmas can be a time of joy and togetherness, but for anyone with an eating disorder, it can feel overwhelming. The emphasis on food, socialising, and traditions can heighten anxiety, especially when routines are disrupted. If you also live with ADHD or autism, the chaos of Christmas can be overwhelming. Possible sensory sensitivities to the textures, smells, or tastes of different foods may add further challenges.

It’s important to remember that these feelings are valid. You are not alone in finding the festive season difficult, and with planning, flexibility, and self-compassion, it’s possible to navigate Christmas in a way that feels manageable and even enjoyable.

Why Christmas Can Be Difficult

The festive season often revolves around food and socialising, creating a mix of excitement and stress. People with eating disorders may feel pressure from themselves or others to eat in ways that challenge their recovery. For many, triggers include eating in front of others, unfamiliar foods, or unhelpful comments like “You look well” or “It’s just one meal—enjoy yourself!”

Social media can amplify these pressures by showcasing images of “perfect” Christmases, where everything seems effortless and indulgent.

These challenges can make it hard to focus on the more meaningful aspects of the season, like connection, celebration, and rest. But while Christmas can feel daunting, it is possible to take steps to reduce its challenges and focus on what matters most to you.

Planning for the Festive Period

Preparation can be one of your strongest tools during Christmas. Having a plan gives you a sense of control and reduces the unpredictability that can increase anxiety.

Start by thinking about the elements of Christmas that feel most stressful. Is it the big family meal? The socialising? The abundance of food around the house? Identifying what feels hardest can help you prioritise your plans.

Tips for Planning Ahead:

Set boundaries: Talk to trusted family members or friends about how they can support you. For example, let them know if you’d prefer not to hear comments about food, weight, or appearance.
Plan meals in advance: If possible, agree on portions or foods ahead of time with someone you trust. This might mean asking them to plate up your food or discussing which dishes you feel comfortable eating.
Have distractions available: Have non-food-related activities ready, such as decorating, playing games, or going for a walk. These can help shift the focus away from food during high-stress moments. Fidget toys can help during mealtimes and blowing bubbles is a great way to reduce anxiety.
Plan comfortable clothes: Plan to wear comfortable clothes that can help you to feel safer. Long-term recovery involves learning to accept your body, but that’s an end goal. Right now, it’s perfectly okay to do what you need to do to make Christmas more manageable.

Finding the Right Balance of Challenge

Recovery involves stepping outside your comfort zone, but the level of challenge matters. If you push yourself too hard, it can feel overwhelming and lead to setbacks. On the other hand, avoiding all challenges can slow progress.

I like to think about challenges on a 10-point scale. Levels 1-5 are challenges that can cause anxiety, but you know you can do them. Levels 6 or 7 challenges that are hard, but doable with planning and support. Levels 8 or above are too much – the risk here is that the emotional fallout of the challenge will result in some form of compensatory behaviour.

Use this scale to help plan challenges. For example, if eating an entire Christmas dinner with the whole family feels like a 10 and, therefore, impossible, you might try sitting at the table with a plate of safer foods instead, which could be a 6. Remember, flexibility is key. A level 6 challenge will look different on different days, and that’s okay!

Navigating Social Situations

Eating in front of others can be one of the hardest parts of Christmas, especially if there’s pressure to appear happy and festive. It’s important to set realistic expectations for yourself and prioritise your well-being over others’ assumptions or traditions.

If big family meals feel too daunting, consider smaller gatherings or eating earlier in private and joining others for conversation afterwards.
Use pre-arranged signals with someone you trust to indicate when you’re struggling. They can help redirect conversations or offer quiet support.
If triggering topics like diet talk or weight come up, it’s OK to excuse yourself or change the subject. For example, redirect the conversation to festive plans or shared memories.

Celebrating Small Wins

Acknowledging all of your wins in recovery is so important!

Recovery is about progress, not perfection. Every win, no matter how small you or others think it is, is a meaningful step forward. Sustainable challenges – challenges that you can achieve and repeat regularly – are the best way to achieve long-term recovery.

Keep in mind that you may find challenging your eating disorder at Christmas harder than at other times of the year. It’s better not to push yourself too hard and get what feels like a smaller win than try to push too hard and have a setback.

Every effort you make to challenge your eating disorder is a step toward recovery, and every step counts. Celebrate your bravery in trying, even if it doesn’t feel like much in the moment. All your wins add up to huge progress.

“I always encourage my clients to record their recovery wins. It’s important to celebrate when we’ve taken a step towards recovery, and writing them down means we can remind ourselves of what we can achieve.” – Richard, our Founder and Director

Be Kind to Yourself

Christmas doesn’t have to be perfect for it to be meaningful. Almost everyone is stressed at some point over Christmas. Whether it’s the chaos of hosting, anxiety that people don’t like the presents that you bought or the pressure of needing to be social. The problem is that the stress and anxiety can quickly spiral and rather than focusing on the positives, your head is full of thoughts that you’re not good enough. This year, practise letting go of the pressure to match your high expectations and focus on moment.

Remind yourself that it’s OK to take breaks when you need them. If you feel overwhelmed, stepping away to read, journal, or listen to music can help you reset.
Focus on the non-food-related joys of the season, like connecting with loved ones, enjoying festive decorations, or watching holiday films.
Remember, Christmas is just one day. If it feels challenging, it doesn’t define your recovery journey.

Reach Out for Support

If the thought of having your eating disorder for another Christmas fills you with dread, we want you to know that help is available and recovery is possible. At our clinic, we provide personalised care tailored to your needs, helping you address your eating disorder and the underlying factors that maintain it.

Please contact us to discuss how we can help you recover from your eating disorder.
Visit our contact page.